The new apartment is going well. I have been Susie Homemaker there. I wet vac'ed the carpet (it was soooo nasty..still kind of nasty but not nearly as bad), I MADE new drapes (they're huge), and last weekend I finally deep cleaned the kitchen. Naturally, my roommates love me. And I love them, for the most part.

Well, I love two of them, Mariah and Kyle. They are rad. The other one is..well. You know, here in the city it always seems to go like this. If you move into an apartment that is shared, there are some people that have been there for a few months, year or two, but then there is that one person who has been there forever and will probably never leave. And there's probably a reason for that. But you can't dislike this person, because it is due to this person and the power of rent control that your rent is not astronomically expensive. So you have to be grateful for this person, but this person is often times socially awkward, creepy, or in some other way, weird.

So that's my other roommate, Nevin. He's really weird. He stays in his room all the time, often times doing obscure psychedelic drugs by himself with the door closed. I wouldn't call him creepy (yet) but socially awkward, yes. I don't think he has any friends. And Mariah tells me he's a virgin. Twenty-seven year old virgin. Ouch. Although I wish the fourth person in the apartment was as cool as the rest of us, I donno, what can you do? He's been there the longest and is the one in control of the lease. So whatever, it's fine. And sometimes mildly amusing. Though also sometimes mildly uncomfortable.

Things with Brian are going well. I am trying to get used to not having drama in a relationship. It's all so eaaasy with him. It feels weird to me! Sometimes I'm worried that I'm bored with him, but I don't think I am. I think I'm actually just used to lots of stress in a relationship, and without that, I feel uncomfortable. We're going up to Yosemite this weekend. That'll be sweet.

Also I'm still talking to Andrew, which is good. We are still good friends. I am of course completely jealous of this new bitch he is hanging out with, but I think that's natural. How are you NOT supposed to be jealous? Even if I DON'T want him anymore? But the thing is I'm not completely totally sure that I don't want him anymore. If he were here, things would possibly be complicated. But he's NOT here and he's not GOING to be here and he's off playing around having fun in his life, and I'm ready to settle down. So it's a moot point I suppose. But still...

I Left my Heart in San Francisco, but...my Underpants in Berkeley?

It has been a while since I wrote the last installment of What is New in Chloe's Life. That has partially been on purpose..I wanted to actually get some things settled before I went and wrote anything, so that I would actually have something solid to tell you. But well, my life seems to be in a constant state of flux no matter what I do, so I've given up waiting for that magical day, lest it never come at all.

Oooooh so much to say...

Last time I wrote was even before Christmas. Well, Christmas was a little hard for Chloe, but it could have been worse. I was pretty bored..I had all this time off of work but nothing to do really. I've been working on the whole "friend" thing, and it's been coming along, but it's a real process.

As an attempt to forge more lasting friendships, I joined this kind of dorky social club thing here in the city. It's actually pretty fun..there are all these different events you can go to, ranging from a wine tasting to visiting a museum exhibition of plasticized bodies to pub crawls to..you name it. It's good because it inspires me to do things I would like to do but that I probably wouldn't bother to figure out how to do and get a group of people together to actually go do. I've made a couple of friends from it too, so that's fun.

Let's see, what else. Well, there's my job. Still working at the property management company. I got a raise recently, woo hoo! So now I'm not QUITE so panicked about money, though of course I still have to count every beer and every Goodwill run that I make. Why did I move to the 2nd most expensive city in the entire country again?? Oh right, because it's awesome.

Yea but anyway, my job. Not very exciting, but at least it's a real Job. And I have health insurance now, look at me! They want me to stick with them actually become a property manager, which I'm sure I could do, but I'm still not entirely sure I WANT to do that but..I donno. For the time being I think I'll stay. I've finally managed to work my way "in" with my co-workers. The bitch at the front desk and I are now sort of friends. It would be a shame to spend all that time wearing somebody down until they like you and then just get up and leave again! No, Chloe must stick to her decisions...Besides, it's not all bad. I have to use my brain a bit, I have some responsibility, and I'm always doing something different.

So what else, oh yea. Major apartment drama. Drama drama DRAMA. I try so hard to keep my life drama-free, but despite my efforts, I am dealing with a huge drama sandwich right now.

So I believe I mentioned to you all the fact that up until recently I was living in a tiny-ass studio apartment with a girlfriend of mine. As you can imagine, this was not an ideal situation. There was absolutely no privacy. In order to have a private conversation we had to talk on the phone in the bathroom, as it was the only door in the place. Not to mention the fact that we were sharing a room, so potential booty calls were definitely hindered. Now that didn't really become an issue....until now (more to follow -- keep reading).

So. We were looking pretty steadily for two bedroom apartments, and eventually we found one that we thought would work. It was pretty small, but it was okay. It was an in-law unit in a house, which means that the landlords live above us. Now there were a few red flags that we really should have seen before we got ourselves into this shit. 1. We were going to be the first tenants they had ever rented to. 2. They were living RIGHT ABOVE us. 3. They were Chinese.

Now, I don't mean to stereotype. Everybody told me before I moved, oh you don't want Chinese landlords. Stay awaaaay from the Chinese landlords. But I poo poo'ed them, saying I wouldn't fall victim to such cultural prejudices. And now..I'm eating my words.

Basically, they're horrible. They want to control our lives. They don't want us to have friends spend the night. They don't want us to drink. There is like no insulation in the place so you can hear everything from upstairs, and I'm sure they can hear us too. It's also really cold. It's worse than living with your parents because you have the same restrictions, but you're paying rent!!

Luckily we realized very quickly, the first weekend we moved in, that they were crazy when they freaked out because I had a boy spend the night (more to follow -- keep reading). I'm sort of glad this happened so early on, because the GOOD thing is that they are letting us out of our lease. So now we're scrounging around looking for new places ASAP. And actually, Carolyn and I are splitting up now. I've already got a place lined up to move into this weekend (THANK GOD) and hopefully Carolyn will soon too. I think Carolyn and I could happily continue to be roommates, but we could also just as easily NOT be roommates. There are pros and cons to both situations, and since I already found a new place, I guess that's how it's going to be.

I'm moving in with three other people, two guys and a girl. I think they have a good vibe going. All I want is to live somewhere I feel comfortable with some chill people. They are definitely 420 and overnight guess friendly, so I think it's going to work out. The place seems pretty clean also, which is good, considering I can be well, a little anal about that. They don't have super-nice things, mostly free stuff from Craig's List. But who am I to judge?

The apartment is very close to where I am staying right now. It's a little farther out than where I was living in the studio, but it's way bigger for the money. Because of this, however, I recently bought a bike. Yes, Chloe is now a bike rider. A biker. A cyclist. Call it what you will, that is what I do. I've come along way from being afraid to even ride Andrew's bike for a split second this summer, to roving around the city, listening to my Ipod, pant leg rolled up like an expert. But let's not forget one thing. What is San Francisco famous for? No, besides Rice-a-Roni. No, besides Alcatraz. No, besides the tremendous homosexual population. It's known for its HILLS! That's right! When people think of San Francisco, they think of steep ass streets and houses built at a 45 degree angle with the road. And now I'm biking those roads.

Okay, so I'm walking the steepest ones. Where I work is on the other side of one of the biggest hills in the city. It takes me about 45 minutes to bike six miles each way in the morning and the afternoon. I can feel myself getting stronger too. Possibly even buff? Perhaps it's too early to go that far. But if I keep this up, maybe, just maybe I will be buff someday. But also, if I keep this up the odds are at one point or another I WILL get hit by a car. Safety lights and all...

But let me just say that only in San Francisco would I find myself on my morning commute waiting at a stop light in front of a car, and sandwiched between two other bikers, also on their morning commute. I love that.

But now let's get to the good part! Chloe's love life! WELL, as I'm sure you can imagine, it's easier said than done to come to a new city, learn the ropes, get well adjusted and build up a fantastic friend group basically from scratch. Hence, why I joined the social club. But equally as difficult as finding friends is finding dates. If not more difficult. Where am I supposed to meet men?? At a bar? All I would find are stupid drunk boys. Eeew. Never one to settle for less than she thinks she deserves, Chloe decided to take matters into her own hands..

And join EHarmony!

Perhaps you've seen the advertisements?

Yes, Chloe has decided to enter the online dating world. I signed up after one particularly frustrating night when I was especially depressed about my friend situation. I had been thinking about doing it for a while, but I finally bit the bullet and did it.

It's this big long process. You have to fill out this extensive personality questionnaire. Then you have to post some photos, fill out a profile thing. Then it starts sending you potential matches. The vast majority of them are totally lame, people I would NEVER date. Either too old, too ugly, too boring, too bald, or too I don't know, something bad. But here and there smattered among them there is a coolish sounding one. So those ones you start to talk to. After going through some steps bla bla bla, you start emailing with people and then, oooh so exciting, you meet them!

So I've met a few people. First guy, I went out with him a few times until I finally gave up when I admitted he was mind-dullingly BORING. And not cute. Second guy was REALLY into me, like, TOO into me TOO fast. Calling me, emailing me, texting me. Yea..I broke that one off pretty quickly. Besides he seemed really square and probably would not have been very, ahem, adventuresome. The third guy I met I actually had some fun with. We talked, we laughed, we got along great. Fucking douche bag never called me back. Why do they DOOO that??

But that brings me to the fourth guy I met, *Brian*.

*Brian* is my new man friend. *Brian* is cute. *Brian* is my age. *Brian* is sweet. *Brian* likes me a lot. He wants to see me ALL the TIME!! Almost TOO much. I've actually said no to hanging out a few times; I dont' want us to be all up each other's ass right away, you know?

Unfortunately *Brian* lives in Berkeley, which is not as convenient as if he lived in San Francisco, but it's not an insurmountable distance. Besides, it's fun to get out of the city sometimes. And he's always coming up with cool ideas for stuff to do, which is a MAJOR bonus. I am not used to having a guy who is so into me though. I mean, I know I'm fabulous, but I'm not used to it being recognized. This boy is DEFINITELY better than Andrew in that department.

Speaking of Andrew, that situation is going pretty well too. We've managed to turn the corner in our relationship. I've told him about *Brian*, and he's told me about some skanky hose beast that he's now dating. I'm really surprised at how well we're managing to continue to communicate. It doesn't hurt that we both started dating someone at exactly the same moment practically.

Personally I think it's absolutely hilarious that I met this guy on EHarmony. I've told most of my friends about it, but I don't think he's told many of his. We've decided for his friends' sake we'll say we "met at a movie," which is not entirely a fib, because we DID meet at a movie. We're just not telling the whole story there. But I think a little white lie there is okay.

So anyway, yay! Exciting! I'll keep you posted on further developments in the *Brian* department. Will Chloe kill herself popping wheelies on her new bicycle? Will she become the property manager she's always dreamed of? Has she finally found her soul mate through Internet dating technology? Stay tuned to find out...

Chloe in San Francisco!

So I made it! So far, so good. Moving from Wyoming (pop. 1/2 million) to the city (pop I have no idea but a lot) is quite a quick and drastic switch, but I should be used to uprooting myself by now -- though I hope that's going to change! The city is kind of scary, but I try not to talk to strangers and not get hit by the bus, and so far I've succeeded! I do keep committing the social faux pas of talking to the bus driver though, but after a few stunned/cold looks in a row, I think I've broken that habit.

So how did Chloe find herself here, sharing a tiny-ass, one bedroom, overpriced apartment with a friend of hers she met at Yosemite? Well I'll tell you how...

It all started a long time ago...when Chloe started to get really fucking tired of having to re-start her life every six months. It's been fun, a lot of fun, but it gets really tiring after a while to have to reinvent your persona every where you go. She especially found this lifestyle frustrating in the male department, having left numerous boyfriends behind, including a Mormon in Alaska (Chloe officially goes on the record to NOT suggest dating a Mormon, ever, now, or in the future) a sweet, but kind of dumb "boyfriend" in Ecuador, a really pretty cool guy in Peru (a relationship with whom she attempted to continue after leaving Peru, but realized it was inevitably doomed from the start), and an especially awesome, adorable boyfriend in Wyoming, with whom happily she continues to be friends, even after parting ways.

In an effort to stop the vicious circle of starting over, Chloe decided she needed to PICK somewhere and SETTLE DOWN for like, 30 seconds. Which is what I'm trying to do here!

As my time in Wyoming drew nigh, I realized I needed a plan for what to do next, and I needed it fast. Serendipitously for me, my friend Carolyn needed a new roommate at precisely the same moment I planned on moving away from Wyoming. Taking that as a sign (or an easy way out, you pick) I decided to jump at this opportunity and move to San Francisco.

Which is what I did! About a month ago. But not without many adventures along the way....

I ended up staying in Wyoming a few weeks later than I had planned on originally, which meant I had to spend my last days doing crap housekeeping work (mostly bleaching bathrooms -- fun!) and experiencing the very beginnings of Wyoming's cold-ass winter. I got out just in the nick of time, let me tell you. I spent like three days at my mom's house in Washington, and then Andrew (the awesome adorable boyfriend) met me and we started on our Great West Coast Adventure Road Trip.

We started out by taking a ferry over to the Olympic Peninsula and headed southward after that. Luck was on our side with the weather, and we actually got to SEE the mountains in Olympic National Park. It was pretty cool! The beach was way cooler than I thought it was going to be, too. GIANT driftwood, cool rocks, awesome. Check out my new Facebook page for pictures!! We spent a few nights camping (for free!) until we made it to Astoria, where we stayed in a hostel. Astoria, as some of you may know, is famous for being the film location for the cult classic The Goonies, the house of which we, of course, visited. I'm sure the owners LOVE that. The hostel, however, was kind of scary, but cheap, so it was okay. What was even better lodging though was staying in a yurt in a campground on the coast. For some reason yurts are really popular in Oregon..weird. I highly recommend staying in one if you get the chance!

After that we went down the Oregon coast, hitting up some more beaches, playing around, etc. Before we knew it we were in California, where Andrew (from Ohio) was very excited to see a palm tree. Highlights include: The Redwood Forest (those trees are HUGE), the giant Paul Bunyan statue outside the Trees of Mystery in Klamath, and bowling in Fort Bragg. Soon we were on Highway 1, the famed coastal highway, known for its spectacular views and jagged cliff faces. We were having a grand old time, and barely arguing at all!

Our luck, however, was about to change....

Now, some of you are familiar with the Chloemobile, my crappy bright tacky blue '96 Plymouth Neon, with the peeling paint and the bumper tied on with twine? Well, it turns out, this road trip was the Chloemobile's last hurrah...

Yes, folks. It was time for Chloe and her Neon to say goodbye. I knew this day was coming, but I just didn't know how SOON...

So we're driving down the coast, slowing but surely approaching San Francisco. Our plan on this particular day was to explore the Point Reyes National Sea Shore and then stay with my friend Rose who works at a hostel at the Marin Headlands, half an hour or so (without traffic) away from San Francisco and Chloe's new home. It was mid-afternoon, and we were heading out to a light house, which is waaay at the end of a remote road. Luckily, however, before we got very far, my car simply stopped running. We towed it to a mechanic in the neighboring town where they determined that the timing belt had snapped, which, for anybody who knows about cars will realize, means your car is busted. Busted for good.

Luckily however, we were not that far away from Rose at this point. We had to do some quick thinking and coordinating in order to make it this last leg into the city now. "Well," I though to myself, "it's a good thing I have a *cell phone* now; that will make this so much easier!" But unfortunately we were stranded in the last place in America that has no cell phone reception, so we spent like $20 on goddamn pay phone calls. But that's okay! We got a nice slice of Northern California Americana while we waited for Rose to come pick us up after work. And we drank Grocery Outlet beer out of a Nalgene while people watching from a bench on the sidewalk. Luckily again, Rose has a Subaru, so she was able to fit all my stuff, myself, herself, and Andrew all in the car, with room to spare. We wheeled my car behind the police station, and I waved goodbye..sadly..as we pulled away.

By the way, I have to give major props to Andrew during this whole ordeal. He was soooo nice and sweet and patient, and didn't get pissed off at all, even though or plans had to suddenly change pretty drastically. I was kind of freaking out (which I'm sure you can all imagine pretty well) and he was being so nice about it, talking to the mechanics and what have you. Do you see why he's so awesome and I was sad to leave him?? By the way I'm sending this email to him too, and I can imagine him now, right this second, shaking his head at me for EMBARRASSING him like this, but any of you who have met him will understand why I must do it because of how adorable and squishy he is!

Anyway, after all that drama, we eventually made it to my tiny-ass apartment. When I say tiny-ass I mean, TINY-ASS. Carolyn and I have to share a bedroom. Luckily (or unluckily) neither of us have any love interests at the moment, so THAT'S not an issue, but hopefully we WILL have love interests, whereupon it will BECOME an issue. But by and by the place isn't so bad. It's just small. We're just kind of casually looking for apartments right now, and when the right place comes along, we'll know. Or something corny like that.

Now, you may be wondering, how is Chloe funding her extravagant lifestyle? I'll tell you how...

I was kind of worried about finding a job. I was thinking it might possibly take me a month or two, but it turns out, I found a job right away, within a week of hardcore looking. I work for a property management company, doing admin assistant stuff. The point of this position though is to grow within the company and become a property manager myself, after I put in my time. So..you might think, well that sounds pretty promising, and it might be..but I'm just not totally sure. The problem is I don't get paid enough. San Francisco is EXPENSIVE!! And I barely make enough to cover rent, buy food, and the occasional six pack. I WILL get a raise, but I'm not sure how much, or when. I need to talk to my boss about that..but he's on vacation. Next week though, I will. The other question is, do I WANT to become a property manager? Is that what my life goal is going to be now? It could be..I'm not sure. I don't have one strong *passion* that is driving me to strive to do one particular thing, so it's hard. There are a lot of things I could do. I just have to pick one...

Which is what I'm trying to do! Pick something and STICK with it. Hence why I want to stay at this job. The longest I've stayed at any job in my life is a year. And there are good things about it..I get all the holidays off, they're pretty laid back, and today I've been continuing the tradition of farting around at work and have composed this email almost entirely while on the clock! And from where I live currently I can walk to work. It takes me about half an hour. Which means I get a little bit of exercise every day. Besides, walking to work while listening to my iPod makes me feel like a rock star! I feel like I'm in a music video..or I'm on drugs. Or both. It's kinda weird. And also, one of the coolest things about San Francisco is that people throw away perfectly good stuff all the time. I've gotten a bunch of free stuff just by finding it on the street! It definitely sets up a definitive pecking order, however. And I am obviously towards the bottom of that pecking order...

Now what I have to work on is my social life. To that end I have just joined this club called Urban Diversion. Carolyn and I went to their open house the other day and decided to become members. They put on all these social events. A wide variety of stuff, from pub crawls and poker nights to hikes to trips to Thailand to speed dating. Speaking of speed dating, I'm going to try to drag Carolyn to one next Wednesday! Should be fun. The people in the group all seemed pretty cool, and they gave us free alcohol. But that was probably in order to loosen us up so we would join, but it totally worked! Social life here I come!

So in a nutshell, although there are still some things I have to work out, life for Chloe is pretty good. And I am pretty happy. I walk down the street, listening to my music, and I start to hear the Mary Tyler Moore theme song play in my head...and that's me! Well kind of. :-)